Friday, December 23, 2005

Where has Chivalry Gone (Part Deux)

On my first post on Chivalry, the ideas were so many that I just ended focusing on the historical part of how "gentlemen" became to be, and the values and/or principles that distinguished them. It is time now to reflect on Chivalry on the 21st century...

I mentioned on that blog that I am old school, and carry a handkerchief; probably my symbol or flag that identifies me as a 'gentleman'. Keeping Chivalry alive. And what are the characteristics that I have that may classify me as one?, you may ask. Let us see.

First of all, I am conscious of some old abstract virtues that make me who I am (click on virtues to see list). With those in mind, allow me to list things that I do in my daily life which I consider to be genrlemanlike, and have been complimented on;

1- I open doors, for anyone and everyone
2- If I take you to lunch, dinner, etc, I offer to pay.
3- I listen to what people say and make sure I learn a thing or two about them.
4- I dress nicely when on dates, or meeting new people.
5- I say thank you and please.
6- I'll give you my coat if you are cold
7- I'll use a "how are you?" when meeting new people, and mean it.
8- I'll use Madame and Sir when dealing with strangers.
9- Always say Good Morning, Good afternoon, hello to anyone you speak to.
10- I will hold the umbrella and be on the outside of it.
11- I will pull out chair for my dates.
12- I will order for them once I know their entree selection.
13- Will order an appetizer/drink if I know its absolutely good, to introduce a friend to it.
14- Will offer my clean/unused hanky for anything needed.
15- Will call my dates after a few days to say hello regardless of interest.
16- Offer the window when traveling on a plane.
17- Try not to walk in front of the girl.
18- Offer positive comments on specific aesthetic issues (a new haircut; pretty dress).
19- Wont mention anything that I might noticed could be out of place.
20- When in doubt, I always ask.
21- Never kiss and tell; and much less make other stories.
22- I honor woman; they could be my mom, sister, wife.
23- I make sure the lid is always down and the sheets clean.
24- Ensure the towel is warm and I do the clean-up.
25- Never, ever give the perception of impropriety when it comes to friends' girlfriends.
26- Do not talk bad about your friends specially girls you just broke up with.
27- Only argue to find the truth; not to spite others.
28- Never raised your voice to a woman.
29- Do not burp, pass gas, or yawn loudly in front of a woman.
30- Respect thyself; respect others.

And I am certain there are others that I do not remember right now. But the most important thing about these is that they should come naturally to a man; they should not be forced in order to impress anyone. If I were to do that, I will miss on all the joy that is to be the best man I can be. And also, I might have failed at doing any one of these at any given time. Just like Michael Jordan missed shots and took bad shots. But still, he is/was Michael Jordan.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great Blog Tony! I work and breath in a space where Chivalry is not always present. So
I welcome other men to act upon your value of Chivalry as a whole that has been lost and hopefully not forgotten.

9:57 PM  
Blogger TMelendez said...

Thank yo anonymous!

Glad to hear there are some 'troops' out there.

Please feel free to add anything that I might have left behind in your comments.

12:19 AM  
Blogger Cheri said...

While I believe in equal pay for equal jobs etc. etc. I do still love a man who has virtue and treats me like a lady!

I adore the value of Chivalry in a man, and if it comes naturally, then it demonstrates that he is a true gentleman through and through. Of course, I've also found these men are usually amazing in bed,

Is that true T-? lol

12:21 AM  
Blogger Lori said...

Woow...I'm surprised some woman hasn't zapped you up!!!...LOL

I agree with Cheri....Very amazing in bed!!!

Have a great day!!!

12:48 AM  
Blogger Desireous said...

Want to get married? :-)

Very nice! I loved the list. You certainly are a dying breed! I liked the one where you shouldn't walk in front of a girl. That is my biggest beef with men. They often do it simply because they walk faster. It makes me feel small and insignificant.

Well I'm very impressed!
Feliz Navidad!

4:08 PM  
Blogger TMelendez said...

# 31..Don't brag nor boast about your prowess.

Everyone that knows me asks the same.. I still dont have an answer.

You are so right.. I still have to be conscious on that one.. I had to learn with my mom... she was short.. and thus very slow.

6:55 PM  

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